Haken's thoughts during a normal day
by Lester Wilson
Summary: This is a little pet project I started involving Haken Browning and Aschen Brodel, from Super Robot Taisen OG Saga Endless Frontier. Rated K-plus, just to be safe. UPDATE: I will make this into a complete story! So, please have patience with me, friends!
1. Waking up

Haken's thoughts during a random job.

Alright! Welcome, one and all, to my first foray into the wonderful world of Super Robot Wars/Super Robot Taisen! I'm just making a one-shot of what goes through Haken Browning's mind as he does a job for an unknown client as a bounty hunter. Please read and review!

"Captain." I heard the voice echo in my head as though it were a dream. The last thing I remember before blacking out was that Aschen and myself had accepted a kinda shady job. Well, I'm not the type to argue, so I told the cowpoke we'd accept, and then we moseyed on to the designated area before we were ambushed by some shady types. "Captain?"

There it was again. It sounds like Aschen. Or maybe the bountiful princess, Kaguya? Nah, she's back home, in Kagura Amahara. There's no way she'd be here. I then came to the conclusion that it was Aschen. "What…?," was all I could get out before stretching and checking for my weapons. The Night Fowl and Longtomb Custom were still here, as were my other little tricks. "Captain, I have estimated that you have been unconscious for approximately one hour and fifty-three minutes. The Gespenst has already cleared the area of the people that ambushed us. Are you all right?" I blinked as Aschen asked this. She was an android, model number W07. You could say she was my sister by how we acted. After all, I was model number W00, a superhuman designed to control my own Personal Trooper, or PT for short. But, being a bounty hunter and the captain of the Zeit Krokodil was a pretty hefty plate for any cowboy. I was soon shaken from my thoughts by Aschen repeating her last question.

"Brother W00, are you all right?" I shook my head and proceeded to stand up. "Yeah, Aschen. I'm fine. Has the target arrived yet?" Aschen shook her head, and I began to think we had failed. "Captain, the target never existed. We were lured into a trap." My eyes widened in shock at this revelation. "We were ambushed?! Aschen, get the Zeit here! We're quitting this job." I shook my head as we walked off to the Zeit, the Gespenst following us obediently. "…….," was all it was capable of saying. I have to admit, Mr. Robot is pretty loyal, being my Personal Trooper and all. But, right now, all I wanted was a nice, long nap.

Please let me know how it is! Thanks!

~Lester


	2. Zeit Krokodil

Haken's thoughts during a normal day Chapter 2: Zeit Krokodil

A/N: I've decided to make this a full-blown story! Please stay tuned for more from the world of Endless Frontier!

"Captain, we should arrive at the Zeit before nightfall." Aschen and I were on our way back to the land battleship Zeit Krokodil, a gift from my 'old man', Representative John Moses, as well as the title of captain. About twenty-five years ago, Aschen and I were found in the wreckage of the Neverland, which was called the Mai Tierra by the people of Lost Herencia.

"Man, I still can't believe that we got set up. I'm planning on running the welcome wagon over their ugly ass when we get back and fill in the crew." Well, I was kinda irritated that we were set up, and that I got knocked out. However, my mind was on something else: The princess of Kagura Amahara, Kaguya Nanbu. "……..," was all the Gespenst said as we walked home. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy Mr. Robot's company and all, but he needed to talk a bit more, even if Aschen was the only one who could understand it.

"I see it! There's the Zeit. Aschen, inform Vice Chief Lee about what happened. We're bringing him some fresh meat." I was obviously still irked about the situation. "*BEEP BEEP BEEP!*" I jumped in surprise as my communicator went off. "Hello, Haken Browning, bounty hunter of Lost Herencia. Is there something you need?" My heart leapt at the voice at the other side. "Haaaaakeeeeennnnn! Eeeeee!" It was Princess Bountiful, err, Kaguya herself! "Princess? How did you get this line?" "Well, I got it from Shirou! I'm hiring you!" My eyes were practically the size of dinner plates by that time. "Well, then let's hear it when I arrive on the Zeit!," I cheered.

When we got on the Zeit, Kaguya was already there. She proceeded to catch me in a death grip and refused to let go. "Eeeeee! Haaaaaaakeeeeennnn! I have an easy job for you!" I was slightly dreading this. I hope it's nothing like garden work. I wouldn't want to get rusty on my skills, now would I? "And what would this job be, my bountiful Princess?" Aschen whispered into my ear at that point. "Captain, please refrain from any unsettling comments." Luckily, Kaguya didn't notice this. "I'm hiring you as bodyguards!," She cheered ecstatically.

"Bodyguards?" I was surprised at this request. Usually, she gave us regular jobs just for the excuse to catch up with us. I could tell this was a serious matter, so how could a cowpoke like myself refuse such a tempting offer? "We accept." "Captain, please do not jump into situations like that. We do not know the full details." Kaguya just blinked at Aschen's last sentence. "Well, I can explain the details later! Let's talk about what we've been up to!" I was afraid of this happening again.

"Err, Aschen, why don't you go speak with the princess?" Aschen walked away casually, leaving me with the Princess. "Captain, I must return to my duties. I am sure you can handle a conversation." I was tempted to let Dr. Marion make a 'mistake' during Aschen's next maintenance session. "Well, Princess, let's go into my room then, shall we?" I was silently dreading this moment as we walked to my room.

And there! What do you think? I hope I kept up to the quality of the first chapter! Please read and review!


	3. Extra 1: Why you don't give a PT a tazer

Haken's thoughts during a normal day - SIDE-STORY CHAPTER 1: Why you don't give a PT a tazer

A/N: I'm gonna be putting little funny crack stories every two or three chapters so you readers can loosen up as you read these hilarity bits.

* * *

Today was a normal day for the Weissritter Abend. It was going around, killing random things, and stealing Mild Keil stones. However, today would also be a…Unique day for it.

"[**Scanning item…Item identified…Tazer. Used to neutralize units. Commonly used in police work to capture criminals without lethal methods. Recommendation: acquire unit and test in battle.**]"

As I'm sure you figured out, the Abend just got a toy that can zap people.

"[**Calculating courses of action…Recommended courses of action: assault people, neutralize potential threats, or test it on an innocent puppy.**]"

After a few moments of deliberation and searching, the Abend tracked down an innocent puppy, and after several moments involving high electrical currents, charred fur, and scenes not meant for young children, the test was concluded, and the Abend decided to abandon the tazer as a means of non-lethal attack.

Besides, the Abend learned that tazers can be far deadlier than most people would expect after reflecting on the results of the test on the puppy.

* * *

A/N: What do you think? Good? Bad? Funny? Dull? Give me your replies!

Also, thanks to Rpgingmaster for supporting my work thus far, anf for giving me advice on how to improve my writing. I'm honored to add to the greatness of Super Robot Wars fanfictions, and grateful to the help I've been given!

Please, read and review!


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